Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize