We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
