I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
