Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize