I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
