Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
