I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
