All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
