That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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