My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
