if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Cover your peen. We're going out.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
