I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize