I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
