Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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