woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
