Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Randomize