I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
