Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
im six kinds of drunk right now
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
