lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
