as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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