Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Randomize
