This girl is more easily done than said...
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
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