Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
