as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
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