yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
