It's Friday. Sex?
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
