3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
