yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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