Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I just blew my weed a kiss
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
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