i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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