Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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