let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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