Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
