I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
