Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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