we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
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