Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
