At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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