I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
