Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
