chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
