Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
