Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize