If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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