How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
The Olympian is in my bed
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize
