Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
