Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
last night I used snow as a chaser
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