Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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