Nicole vs. Life
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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