I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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